Once the soldier and I parted company I made my upstairs to get directions to go to the ‘Western Wall.’ The bus station was like any other in the US only this one had soldiers walking around carrying some of the most deadly weapons and they will be used in the blink of an eye if they must. When I exited the station I asked the two soldiers ‘how do I get to the wall?’ They looked at each other as if I’d asked them a trick question. ‘The wall’ they replied, ‘yes the western wall’ ‘We don’t know’ and they suggest I go inside and ask someone – no one in particular just ask someone. ‘I know you need to take a trolley’ ‘do you know which one?’ ‘No’ he responds.
Well I approached what appeared to be an information desk and I asked the two men sitting at it ‘how do I get to the wall.’ ‘The wall?’ ‘Yes the western wall.’ ‘What wall are you talking about sir?’ ‘You’re joking?’ ‘No sir we don’t know what you’re talking about.’ And they went about the business of helping other people. Imagine going to DC and you ask a person ‘where is the wall?’ And they have no idea of what you’re talking about, well that was the hell I was trapped in, only I’m in Jerusalem, asking how do I get to the most important place in the Jewish religion.
This can’t be happening, is someone filming me I am saying to myself. ‘Can you help be get to the wall?’ Once again blank stares and again ‘what wall are you talking about sir and this time I just exploded because I took out my book Are you kidding me?– ‘the wall!!! western, wailing, Pink Floyd – the wall, the wall, the wall!!! ‘Ohhh’ one of them responded ‘you want the wall, the Western Wall’ ‘finally’ I said – ‘so how do I get there?’ ‘I don’t know’ and I was wondering if one of the soldiers would just shoot me and end my misery.
And then this lady from Cincinnati saw the hell I was in and told me how to get there and when I asked ‘why didn’t anyone here know what I was talking about?’ This 5’5″ ultra-orthodox looks up and me responds – ‘because they’re stupid.’
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For those you that do visit Jerusalem from Tel Aviv. You will take Bus 405 that always departs from platform 607 and make sure you get there early, unlike bus laws in the US they do not exist in Israel and they will fill the bus to capacity. Once you arrive at the bus station, it takes only an hour from Tel Aviv, go up one, maybe two flights and cross the street and board the trolley to the ‘Old City’ stop.
And if you do need assistance simply ask for ‘The Old City’ and you can prevent the hell I went through. The trolley runs on the honor system, you buy tokens at the stop and put them in the slot once you board. And for those that choose not to pay you will feel every single eye on that trolley on you.
As always thanks for reading, and please share some of your travel nightmares with me.